Being Controversial

It can be really hard to be open about some parenting/lifestyle decisions you make. Even if there is not a clear-cut, obvious "right" thing to do, very often people feel like there is. And they don't hesitate to tell you.

Will I defend my decisions? Absolutely. For most decisions, I have done research and come to the conclusion that my decision is the best. I like to really be informed before I make a decision, especially if I will be changing something I currently do. The reasons I made my decision may be different than the reasons you used to make the same decision. You may have come up with other reasons that are more important to you, and thus made a different decision. 

It shouldn't matter how I parent my child as long as he is not in danger and is healthy. We should be allowed to make informed decisions that other people might not make. I try, although I know I don't always succeed, to avoid telling people they should do something specific for their kid, especially if it is unsolicited (my primary exception being breastfeeding! All mothers should give it an educated try, because the odds are heavily in your favor that you'll succeed!)

I think the other problem with being "controversial" is that it's so easy to say things behind the anonymity/impersonality of the internet and Facebook. You can insult people much easier when you aren't doing it to their face to see their reaction. 

Confession time: what non-mainstream/"controversial" thing do you do? Mine would probably take up another separate post (or two...)

Breastfeeding With a Passion

It's been difficult for me to figure out how to say what I want to say. While I disagree with mothers who voluntarily formula-feed their babies, I don't want my words to come across as judgmental at all. I think there are great mothers who breastfeed and great mothers who formula-feed. Especially for those mothers who tried to breastfeed but couldn't, please know that I'm not trying to make you feel guilty. As one of my friends said, things don't always go the way you planned, even though that can be hard to accept.

I hope my passion is not offensive, but that it rather encourages people to learn more or ask questions or maybe just consider breastfeeding if they never thought they would. That being said...

I love breastfeeding. It was difficult (painful and sleep-depriving) the first six weeks or so. Thankfully, it did get easier (even though when you hear that and your toes curl in pain when your baby latches on during those first six weeks, you don't believe it) and now Declan latches on, pain-free, like a pro.

I think that many mothers and mothers-to-be just are not as informed about breastfeeding as they could be. I always knew that I would breastfeed my children, that was never a question for me, but once I researched and learned more, I became passionate about it.

I understand that some women can't physically breastfeed for one reason or another, and I'm so glad we have formula for those instances. What I don't understand is women who just choose to formula feed without giving breastfeeding their best effort first. I hope that doesn't sound judgmental - I'm just saying I don't understand it. Why would I voluntarily choose an option that requires more effort and much more money when there is a nutritionally superior (and vastly cheaper) option available? Granted I'm biased in favor of breastfeeding, but voluntarily formula-feeding just doesn't make logical sense to me.

Anyway, I wanted to offer four tips that I have either learned from experience (you know, because after four months I'm an old hand at breastfeeding! ha!) or have read and incorporated successfully.

1. Just because your baby is eating all the time does NOT mean you don't have enough milk.
Declan breastfed about every two to three hours until he was about two-and-a-half months old, and I know without doubt that I had enough milk, because I was dealing with oversupply. With breastfeeding, you can't really measure how much milk your baby is getting each time they eat, so they may be just eating smaller amounts more frequently. Obviously I would see a doctor if your baby isn't gaining weight or seems unhealthy for one reason or another (which, if that was the case, you could try supplementing breastfeeding with formula while trying to increase your supply, I know one of my friends did that). And if you think that your milk supply seems to be decreasing, it may just be normalizing to the amount your baby actually needs to eat (see this page for additional info).

2. If you are pumping and not getting very much milk, try adjusting the pump.
Maybe this is TMI, but I have one flat and one inverted nipple - in other words, my nipples don't stick out. Because of this, I can't always tell if I'm "centered" properly in the pump. I have found that if I adjust my position in the pump (up or down, make sure it's not too tight, etc) I can get a lot more milk.

3. If you are concerned about milk supply, drink more water.
I have noticed, when pumping, that my milk seems more plentiful when I am staying hydrated. I guess it makes sense - you need liquid to make liquid! I think the key here is to drink water, not soda or coffee (caffeine actually dehydrates you!). I'm not sure about juice, milk, decaf tea or herbal tea, whether they would be hydrating or not. I mean, I'm not saying you have to drink only water, I'm just saying drink more water than you are already drinking. Probably drink more water than you think you need to.

And my last tip?
4. Don't give up without a fight! Obviously, the most important thing is your baby's health, so if you can't breastfeed, I say purchase that formula with confidence, knowing you are doing what's best for your baby. However, don't give up breastfeeding at the first sign of difficulty, or if it's hard the first few weeks. Find help and support, do research, ask questions, try different things. If you can do it, it really is best for you and your baby :-)

Kellymom.com is a great breastfeeding resource... lots of information!!

Ok... I got that off my chest (ha, breastfeeding... chest... punny, right?) I hope I haven't offended any mothers out there. I still want to be friends, even if you disagree with me :-)

So, for anyone who reads this: Did you/do you breastfeed or forumla-feed your baby/ies? Why did you make that decision? For those that breastfeed/fed, I'm also curious to know how long your baby/ies were breastfed, if you don't mind sharing! If you haven't had kids yet, which do you think you'll choose to do and why?